addressees of rights

To do anything but sit here. Studying isnapos;t "fun" for anyone, but I should be able to take a stab at it.
I found his journal and had the rare privilege to read the most hateful, obsessive, scary things written about myself. I had to stop reading half way through it. Itapos;s not normal. Heapos;s messed up.

I wish Marsha knew how itapos;s going to be in a couple of years when she figures out that study abroad takes a lot of MONEY, not just the idea and(I will give her credit where credit is due)extreme motivation. Maybe Iapos;m just bitter and sheapos;ll really learn Chinese and go to China and become an ambassador or what ever the hell it is she wants to do. No, Iapos;m definitely bitter.

I still have this need for everyone to read my thoughts. I want to broadcast them to someone. All I can do is sit here and look at Rachel Bilsonapos;s latest outfit or read about the breakup of Holly Madison and Hugh Hefner. Other people whose lives are broadcasted. I donapos;t want to look at myself right now because Iapos;m too... Nothing. I donapos;t know what to do with myself.

I cut back my activities because I was too overwhelmed. Now Iapos;m bored. If Iapos;m not dealing with some crisis my life is nothing, no where, motionless.
I want someone to wake me up. What am I doing? Where did I go? Without problems I am no one. I want to be someone without the problems.

I think Ms. K is right, I think we all have unlimited potential. But what if you donapos;t have a clue as to what yo should do with that potential? I donapos;t know where to concentrate my energy, what to do with myself.

I should be smarter than this. I feel like stress has zapped me.

I want my new project to be me.

ME.

Focus: Jennica

Thesis/Objective: To discover new ways to have fun, make projects to look forward to and find outlets for my energy/anger/frustration.

Right now... How do I feel.

-I feel like my feelings are constantly changing.
-I feel like I want to read more.
-I feel like I want to spend less time on this computer.
-I want to have more fun with my friends.
-I want to find cool things to do in Tampa.
-Realize life is more simple than I think it is.
-Just be.

Maybe I need all this crap because I have no thoughts in my head.

I need some damn confidence. I need something inside me to pick me up when I start blushing and stammering. I need something in me to hold me together.

exit realitor, addressees of rights, addressen email vind, addressentries, addressentry.